An update on Max

In spite of all the research we have done on raising a puppy, life after one week with Maximus is full of surprises. Suprise #1 is that in going from 4 to 5 weeks old, he has grown a lot. Like, at least 40% bigger than he was a week ago. According to Pedigree's bag instructions, it was supposed to take 7 days to go from mush to hard puppy chow. He did it in 3. And he eats the stuff 4 times a day, and then begs for more 30 minutes later. It must be the yeti in him.

Shel and I planned on crate training Max as soon as possible. Up until now, he has slept in a cardboard box with some towels, and he loves it. Only, he is quickly outgrowing it. So today I went to the dog market to get a crate for Maximus. I thought we would go with a medium size, but the medium size was about the same size as the box, so I had to go large. Unfortunately, they are color coated by size, so if you wanted large, you got purple. Not so great for a dog named Maximus, but once he gets all his adult teeth, I'm sure he'll chew the purple right off and reveal the steel bars underneath! High hopes for the little guy I know... I also purchased a new bed for him which fit perfectly in the large sized crate. The crate is a little big for him right now, so I am hoping the bed discourages him from segmenting a spot of his crate for doing his business. The idea in crate training after all is to speed up the house breaking process. He likes the crate, and it fits all his toys:

Another thing about Max growing up so fast is that he gets into more and more every day. In the past couple of days, he has discovered the power of his nose. Now on walks, he gets distracted every 5 seconds. He used to run 20 feet and get tired, now he runs 20 feet and gets distracted by a leaf, a piece of construction tile, or a trashbag. Right now, he can't reach the coffee table yet, but at this rate of growth, its only a matter of days. First the coffee table, then the trash can, then the kitchen countertops. As I am typing this, he is trying to eat my computer. Here is a video of a minute and a half with Max.

For all of you dog experts, no worries. We learned the newspaper room technique from the internet, and everything on the internet is 100% reliable. When we are gone, his toys, treats, water, and crate will all go in the bathroom with him. We don't leave our dog to to starve and wallow in his own urine and feces, at least without first giving him several other entertainment options. We love our dog!

christmas 2009 more pictures

Jarred with all his gifts from Rusty and Kathryn. That is a Dwight Schrute notepad.

This is the new IKEA loveseat Tim and Jane got us for Christmas!

And Pop gave us money for Christmas, which we are using part of it to buy plants for our house. Here are the first couple that we have purchased.

New Earrings from Kathryn and Rusty!

And Christmas socks from Rusty and Kathryn!

And my new scarf. Thanks Kathryn and Rusty!

disclaimer: i didn't go out of the house like this, i promise. i changed into jeans and i think i added like 4 layers. the shorts were just for sock-modelling purposes. disclaimer finished.

christmas 2009

Merry Christmas everybody! We wanted to give you an update on our Christmas here in East Asia. We spent all day yesterday just the 2 of us- sleeping in on our 1st of 2 days off (yay!), talking to my family, zipping around our little town, and baking/cooking for dinner. We spent Christmas Eve with our friends/neighbors and enjoyed dinner and exchanged gifts. I made corn pudding (it can't be Christmas dinner without it, even if some substitutions have to be made!) and mashed potatoes, and Jarred made a from-scratch peppermint red velvet cake for dessert. The homemade peppermint-cream cheese frosting was to die for. You see, Jarred is an incredible cook, which I benefited from greatly when we were here before, however since we got married his skills haven't been used quite as frequently for some odd reason. So, I and a few others were greatly blessed by him baking this. It was awesome!

We had a turkey dinner complete with stuffing, gravy, and cranberry sauce. Jarred is outspoken in his love for canned, jellied cranberry sauce. He didn't get any for Thanksgiving, but his Mom sent a package in which I removed the special can of sauce and wrapped it for him. He opened it right before we went over to Josh and Danielle's for dinner, and enjoyed sliced jelly cranberry sauce along with his turkey. I'm pretty sure everybody else besides us ate the real stuff, but it didn't make a difference because he almost ate the entire can by himself. Danielle had set the table so beautiful, and we had a great time eating together. Danielle and I had bought a frozen turkey a few weeks ago, and she cooked it in a bag she had from America. It was an incredibly successful first-go at a turkey. It was like being in America for Christmas dinner.Even Max was given a personal invite to dinner (Josh and Danielle's is like his second home), and showed up clean after a bath, with even a Christmas bow! He spent the night trying to scratch it off. After dinner, Max got to chew on a turkey bone Josh gave him, and I think it was the greatest thing he had ever tasted. After dinner, we had a time of praising- reading Luke, lighting the last candle on the Advent wreath we have been doing all together, and singing a few songs whose lyrics are simply divine and capture my heart anew every year I celebrate this holiday so rich in precious meaning. I loved it. So grateful for these people around me, and even more so for the One whom we celebrate! We then exchanged gifts according to the person's name we had drawn. Grace gave me an awesome calendar, a book cover, and a bag of tortilla chips from one of my favorite western restaurants in the city. Josh gave Jarred a National Geographic DVD about Mount Everest, which he is currently watching. It was a wonderful Christmas Eve celebrating together!

We woke up this morning truly grateful that after a brief awakening at 5:00, Max slept until 7:30. Jarred and I spent our first Christmas morning just the 2 of us and it was awesome! We read the story of J's birth and spent some time chatting together. It was such a sweet time for the 2 of us together to really celebrate Christmas. Every year I learn more and more about the Christmas story and am touched and changed by a perfect king coming to earth and being born in such a humble way, and this year has been no different.

We then opened our presents from Kathryn and Rusty, which we are so thankful for! We will put pictures up soon modelling our new gear, and our presents that we already have from Tim and Jane and what we have gotten with gifts from others! We then opened our gifts to each other and it was really fun. Jarred connived with Kat and Rusty to get me lots of my favorite things from America including chai mix, york peppermint patties, southern season coffee, and caramel coffee. He also got me a tea kettle that I love. My Uncle Rob got us a really awesome one for our wedding, but it was too big to bring over here, so I am so so glad to have one here now! Thanks to our friends Chris and Sarah and Amy for helping keep it out of my sight :) I got Jarred a few things that had been on his wish list including a weight bench, p90x, and some crocs shoes. i am pretty proud of myself for accomplishing (ok, josh and danielle graciously helped!) online shopping in east asia (think all characters) because jarred's shoes were $85 in the store and i got them for about $7.

then our friends/neighbors came over for brunch that jarred and josh were making for us. we had a delicious breakfast of biscuits and gravy, omlets, and fruit. and then we just hung out at our house for a long time, enjoying time relaxing and playing cards. now we are getting ready for them all to come back over for leftovers followed by a very special birthday party tonight with some very special friends. and that may be my most favorite part of all.

and we plan to end our night calling our families in america when it will be christmas day for both of us. we miss our families with our whole hearts right now more than ever and wish we could be there to celebrate with you! talking to you will make our day :)

so that's a short summary of the last day or so. i love christmas and being here always helps me remember truly why it is so powerful and important.

merry christmas, from our house to yours.

meet max

so this one night my husband brought home a stray dog. it sounds like the start of a bad joke or something. or something i might tell about a crazy family down the block or something. except "this one night" happened to be last friday in my life. and the scary part...we decided to keep the dog. clearly there is a lot to fill you in on...

we'll start with the night that will now forever be etched in my memory. last friday night we were at the school where jarred studies with a bunch of friends celebrating the coming holiday and everything was going great (and completely normal and ordinary). but one of jarred's friends happened to show up with a little puppy. and by little i mean really really little. and cute. irresistably cute to my husband, who spent pretty much the whole night holding the dog. jarred's friend had been given the pup from a friend who found him on the street.

but then the night ended and we were getting ready to head out. jarred mentions to me that his friend can't keep the dog (i mean, seriously, what college student living in a dorm could?) and said he could have it. we go back and forth for a few minutes debating. on one hand, we have been talking about getting a dog since 1. before we were married 2. a lot in the past couple months. we had pretty much decided that we would get a black lab (i voted golden retriever, jarred voted weimereiner, somehow we agreed on a lab) and that we would probably get one in february when we had some more time. we also though had also discussed at length wanting to get a rescue dog that would otherwise have no home and probably die. and that would probably mean not a studly and beautiful black lab, but would have such a deep meaning that we loved. and kat and rusty's dog brooklyn is a rescue and (apart from attacking a few other dogs in her life) she is one of the greatest dogs ever! i sometimes think jarred misses brooklyn as much as any of our actual family members.

but all of that to say, i don't make rush decisions. seriously, my parents told me the last week of april my senior year of college that i couldn't go to my soccer tournament in new york until i decided where i was going to go to college. i think decisions to death. but this decision, jarred and i have talked to death. we had considered every possible scenario and situation. we had talked through a dog fitting in our budget. we talked through when we would have kids and the pros and cons of a dog before kids or after. getting it back to america whenever we move home. laws about having a dog here. where the vet in our town is. what to do with it when we travel. as i said, i think decisions to death. i am a planner. and that night, bringing home a dog was not in the plan. however, jarred makes rash decisions. i use the word rash lightly because it usually implies not thinking or poor decisions. but jarred's decision are great decisions, just fast. super fast.

so anyways, back to the story. jarred catches up with his friend who has already started to walk away. and we (and our neighbors here) spend the next 20 minutes talking about the dog and debating whether or not to take him home. and then jarred decided we would and we got in josh and danielle's bread van and drove home.

we said 1 night. and on saturday afternoon one of my teachers was going to help jarred take the dog to the vet. if it didn't have horrible diseases and wasn't going to be a normal ea squat dog weighing in at a grand total of 10 pounds we would discuss keeping him. we both want a dog to run with us, and i am determined any dog i ever have will swim. and since our house was totally unprepared for a dog, we turned a paper box into a dog bed and he ate rice and water friday night.

saturday afternoon, jarred loaded the dog up in his backpack and hung it on the front of our scooter to go into town to the vet. and he screamed the entire way. and then, lo and behold, the vet was closed on the weekend. so the dog got to stay until at least monday morning when he would return to the place canines dread most. and it meant that our neighbors had 2 more days to wear us down into keeping the dog. josh even said that if we didn't keep him he would, but danielle squashed that in about 2 seconds. the most he got was a "we would maybe consider it." monday morning jarred returned to the vet. after being sent to the wrong place, searching for an hour, and waiting for 30 minutes on a street corner where a vet worker was going to come meet him to take him to the right place, jarred and the pup (we said we weren't going to name it before we decided if we were going to keep it or find it a new home) made it to the vet. and the vet was all great news! no problems at all. great health. 4 weeks old. 4 pounds. will grow up to be a medium-sized dog.

and so that afternoon we decided to keep him. that's right, we now have a dog. well, right now, a tiny puppy. who walks with us around the complex, runs about 20 feet and is tired, nips our toes with his puppy teeth, and eats a mixture of chicken and rice mush and purina puppy chow.

then it came time to name him. jarred has always wanted "his" dog. and in his dream his dog would be named maximus. strong, studly, gladiatorial maximus. and i was fine with that. before we got a dog here. i mean, we live in east asia. i could just imagine the conversation:

asian: what is your dog's name?
me: max
asian: mahxs. oh so great!

i just couldn't handle the whole town thinking the foreigners had named their dog marx. not ok. i voted xiongmao. east asian for panda. he is black and white and kind of looks like a bear right now. it's a cute name. i thought it fit. and we live in asia, i thought an asian name was appropriate. so we have 2 great asian friends here who are excellent sounding boards and both told me xiongmao was a bad name, really bad. after that stunning blow, i soon caved and made jarred's dream come true. we now have a dog named maximus. i call him max. but if a local ever asks, it's maximus, only maximus. and i'll end with a last note that jarred thinks he is 3/4 part black lab and 1/4 part yetti/beast. not sure what that means, but pretty sure it's not true.

we already have lots of stories, which will be shared very soon, i am sure. but right now i am exhuasted, so i will just leave you with come pictures and head to bed.

meet max:

Education education education

In America, education is important. In East Asia, education is everything. From the time a child reaches the age of kindergarten, the parents or grandparents are desperately searching for the best kindergartens that will get their child into the best grammar schools that will get their child into the best middle school to get their child into the best high school so they can be the best prepared for the most important moment of their life- the college entrance exam, so they can get into the best college. Stories are rampant of government officials and the wealthy bribing officials at notable universities to let their child in with extravagant meals and money. Children from age 5 are in school from 7am to 5 or 6pm. I have been walking through an apartment complex at 10:30 pm, seen a light on in a house, and a child no more than age 7 at a desk crashing the books. Some parents in America dream of their children going to Harvard, some dream of them becoming a notable musician, others dream of their child becoming a sports star. Here, millions and millions of parents all share the exact same dream, for their child to be admitted to a narrow list of four or five universities. On the day of the college entrance exam, temples are full of parents and grandparents towkowing and burning whatever fake money can be burned. Taxis give free rides to students. Families who usually can't afford meat at every meal slaughter a hog to make sure their one hope in this world goes to bed with a full belly. Competition is rampant, and in a culture where parents expect to have their dreams fulfilled, the stress on students is unimaginable.

Now my parents also valued education. My mother started me reading at age 3 (and she's not even of the Asian half of my family background). I had a dream much like these parents have for their students. I wanted to go to UNC. I realized that dream. It was great. However, never did I feel the pressure, stress, and competition that these students feel.

So, being a student in the midst of this student culture is quite an interesting experience. Mostly because I am not trying to graduate from my school, nor am I even trying to get a grade. My goal is simply to become proficient at the language. Teacher, however, expects me to be like any other student. Sometimes I believe she thinks I am supposed to have all of my hopes and dreams riding on how I perform in my class, and her opinion of me as a student. For instance, today, I was reading a text in characters, and I said a character in a wrong tone. I always say this character in the wrong tone, and she always corrects me, each time a little angrier than the last. Today was the last straw. I committed the foul crime only once, and she told me "Jie Rui! If you say this word wrong one more time, you will have to write it 100 times!" To the average East Asian student, this would strike fear into their heart. To be shamed like this would be too much to bear. They would bring shame to their families. It is a pretty common practice to punish students in this way in a shame based culture. Grammar school students are beaten on the hand for writing with their left hand to break them of the horrible habit. Even when they learn to write English letters, they are punished if their letters aren't written in the standard way, so in college, every student has the exact same English handwriting. One time in class 2 years ago, I was writing my name on the board for my teacher in English. I write in all caps, as many adult males do. It is neater and more legible, and our handwriting is notably bad otherwise. When I wrote my name, she actually said "Please write your English correctly. This is incorrect, your R should look like this." MY EAST ASIAN TEACHER CORRECTED MY ENGLISH HANDWRITING! I have even heard stories of students who are late to class having to stand in a corner... in college. The punishments just don't strike the same chord with me, probably because I am 27 year old and have obtained a college degree without ever having had to fear standing in a corner. So threats about writing a character 100 times makes the fleshly side of me want to write it only 98 times... just to spite my teacher for treating me like an 8 year old (or 18 year old depending on what country you are in.)

Another practice common to education worship here is making up missed class. Schools are required by the government to have their students in class for a certain number of hours. In America, we have to be snowed or stormed out for weeks before we start cutting back on our holiday vacation days to make up class. Here, they go to school on weekends to make up class that is missed because of their already scheduled holiday vacation days! So today, my teacher saw that I had missed 5 days of class because of Shelley being sick, and I'm going to miss 5 more because I'll be out of town. Apparently, the foreign student office looked at my attendance rostrum (yes, I actually have to sign one of those each day) and saw my missed classes and told my teacher that the classes must be made up or I will have visa problems. We are still going to have a final exam (yes, I actually have to take one of those too) on the same day as before, December 31st, but I will proceed to go to class for 2 weeks after I return to town in January. Yet again, another reminder of how lost I am in this culture sometimes. I'm just glad I never inherited my mother's left-handedness.

Christmas decorations!

Here are some pictures of our Christmas decorations that you can actually see!

On top of our tv cabinet:

Our growing collection of Christmas cards from friends and family on a shelf in our kitchen:

Our nativity scene that I am obsessed with:

Our stockings that replaced pictures on our wall above our couch since there aren't fireplaces to hang them over in East Asia. I just saw that these were our old stockings before ours from America got here a week ago. I'll try to put a new picture up, but I think I just killed Jarred's camera with a virus, so that might be a problem.

Our Christmas tree!

In the corner you can see our advent wreath. I just took a picture of it up close, but the aforementioned camera virus has posed a dilemma for posting it.

christmas-time

christmas is here! well, not quite. but in our lives over here christmas lasts for a month. and i love every minute of it. so, in honor of this being the season now, i thought i would share my top 10 favorite things going on right now:
10. christmas movies- we kicked off the christmas season watching elf on thanksgiving. it takes the cake as the funniest christmas movie ever, i'm pretty sure. and let's be honest, home alone is now a classic. i have watched it so many times i can quote it, but i laugh every time. and i like telling the story of my whole family seeing it in the theater when it came out and my little sister yelling out that she too could sled down our staircase and out the front door. and now she lives in chicago with the snow to actually do it.
9. christmas music- it has been playing pretty much constantly in our house since Dec 1st and i really love it. and new accomplishments in my life include becoming a professional singer. granted, i'll use the word "professional" loosely. nonetheless, in the past 2 weeks i have sung christmas carols in front of probably over one hundred students in classes. thankfully, each time i had at least 1 partner with me. this isn't ironic at all, unless you fully understand what a terrible singer i am. the only thing i have going for me is volume. and the only preparation in my life i have for this sudden thrust into vocal performing is 2 years of high school chorus, and the only reason i took it was because i had to have an art credit to graduate and i am even worse at art than i am singing. i am glad it is the heart that counts. and that people here don't really know the exact notes the christmas carols are supposed to be :)
8. christmas drinks- i kicked off this part of the season like a month ago with our first pot of apple cider. and since then have had lots of hot chocolate, spiced coffee, and tea. and living near danielle, i benefit by getting to drink her peppermint mochas and egg nog. yum.
7. our christmas tree- granted, it is fake and that's definitely not as cool as a big, beautiful, real frasier fir, but we have a good looking fake tree. every morning the past 2 weeks, i have sat in our living room reading with the tree lit up and it has been so beautiful and peaceful. i also love it at night when it is sparkles and i get to sit on the couch with jarred. last year when we were engaged, jarred bought a ton of ornaments for our christmas tree for once we got married as a surprise for me looking ahead to this year, our first christmas together, and they make our tree simply wonderful!
6. packages- this past week we got our first package in the mail! and our 2nd and 3rd and 4th! we have been so blessed by our friends brian and kelly who sent us an awesome package with lots of christmas presents and goodies like candy and coffee and christmas socks; jarred's parents for sending us a netti pot (i've used it twice and it is awesome~i'll blog about this crazy thing soon probably) and all of the christmas ornaments jarred bought me last year for our tree here; for my mom sending these awesome bracelets from some friends in norfolk that we will get to use to bless many friends; and for my sister kathryn sending us a box of incredible things that only a good big sister would know to send (and beef jerky- i think that was from rusty to jarred), including the only christmas presents currently under our tree! thank you, thank you, thank you!
5. christmas parties- these make me love being here. i am literally giddy with excitement every time friends come over, exhausted when they leave, and always looking forward to the next time.
4. our advent wreath- after picking up some candles and grabbing some holly berries from the bushes near the lake across the street, i made us our very own advent wreath in asia! it is on our coffee table, and it has been sweet time to light a candle as a family every monday night as we start our week together.
3. our nativity scene- jarred and i went to a christmas fair in town last weekend and my favorite purchase was a nativity scene. the store that made it employs deaf and disabled east asians which is the first reason i love that place. and their stuff is just awesome. one of my favorite things about our nativity set is that you (whoever you are) don't have one like it. very few people in this world probably do. yes, it has a sheep and a camel. and baby j is the same. but the wise men, shepherds, even the angel have black hair- they are all east asian! i think that is pretty awesome. i'm not saying j was east asian, but he certainly wasn't american or white. i just like it.
2. my first christmas with jarred- it is an absolute blast to go through this season married to jarred. it just makes everything more fun! it is an adventure to talk about traditions from each of our families, and plan new ones for us as a family
1. every day i have been picking a verse to meditate on throughout the day that goes along with the christmas story and it has been so sweet. definitely my favorite thing right now.

i'll post pictures of everything soon!

Life update

We realize it has been too long since we have posted, and much has happened in the meantime, so here is a quick flyby of the past 3 weeks:

The week before Thanksgiving saw the arrival of the coldest weather we've ever experienced in our city. And to make it worse, we had to ride our little scooter to class all week. You know when you're driving down the road in bad weather and you see the guy on the motorcycle and you think "He must be freezing!" That guy was Shelley and I, only doing a maximum speed of 30 mph downhill, which makes it windy enough to freeze anything that isn't covered by 4 layers, yet slow enough to prolong the misery for a good 30 minutes. To make things worse, buildings where we live aren't built for sub-freezing temperatures, or sub-60 degree temperatures for that matter, so they are all-concrete buildings with no central heating. We were living in a refridgerator. Literally. I opened our refridgerator one night and though it was broken, only to realize it was just the same temperature inside the fridge as the rest of our apartment. The only protection is to cover up with as many layers as possible. Here is an example of our outer wear for the week. In this picture, we are about to ride on the scooter. It has literally just snowed one of those cold, wet snows that doesn't stick, but just makes the roads slicker and everything more cold. Very similar to NC, except this 5 minute flurry didn't shut down school for 3 days.

The following week was Thanksgiving, week, which started with a return trip to the hospital for the return of Shelley's sick bug. We took her to get the magical IV on Tuesday night, and ended up just sleeping at the hospital on Tuesday night because A. It didn't cost anything extra, B. It was 11:30PM by the time the started the IV, C. The room had heat. We returned Wednesday to rest Shelley while I tried my hand at Thanksgiving food preparation. We spent Thanksgiving with our friends in a meal complete with turkey and gravy. On Friday, we traveled to a larger city to spend the weekend with some friends. This is where the famous "Turkey Bowl" takes place. I love the Turkey Bowl. It pits many ACC alum against many SEC alum in a flag football game that is rarely competitive yet always entertaining. I had been excited to play, only to twist my ankle on the second play from scrimmage. Being the blitzing linebacker comes with its risks. I hobbled off the field, tightened the laces, and went back on. After the game, while accompanying Shelley on a trip to IKEA, I realized that walking was difficult and painful only to look down and see that I couldn't see the top of my shoe through my right swollen ankle. The motto of the week is rest, ice, compress, elevate. I'm hoping to back at it in a couple of weeks. Overall, it was an exhausting Thanksgiving week in which we missed being home with family very much.

And to cap it all off, on Monday of this week, we decorated the house for our first married Christmas together! This morning I commented that I actually enjoy chick-flicks that are set around Christmas because I like the combination of love and Christmas. Shelley asked me "like which ones?" I could not think of a single example in my head. Maybe this idea of the Christmas chick flick is something I dreamed up, but I could have sworn that a lot of romcoms have Christmas themes. Either way, I'm excited to spend Christmas with the love of my life in our first apartment together. Here are some pictures of our decorations. Our tree is a little pitiful right now as we are awaiting the arrival of our ornaments kindly sent by my parents in America, and a strand of light blew out right on the middle of the tree, and I haven't replaced them yet.